At the risk of wandering too far off topic, I want to begin our next post analyzing Jim’s career arc in The Office (television series) by drawing an analogy to Office Space (1999 cult-classic movie). You may be aware of this movie. Heck, you may have even watched it (which I do recommend).
But, even if you haven’t watched it, the ideas and classic dialogue embedded in this movie have probably touched your life. In might have happened in a way you noticed and remembered: ever heard someone use the now highly-popularized phrase “case of the Mondays”? Other times, the allusions from this move sound so mundane that they may slip by your conscious awareness, like when Bill Burr used the iconic phrase “TPS report” (which is a euphemism for a largely useless, bureaucratic paperwork exercise) in The Mandalorian.
By the same token, many concepts from professional development literature have permeated culture. Even if you’re not the kind of person that devours leadership and professional development books, there’s a good chance that ideas put forth in the seminal book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey have entered your thoughts, consciously or otherwise.
I want to call out one of those ideas. Or, as Stephen Covey would call it, the second “habit” on his list for highly effective people: Begin with the end in mind.
Now, as I’ve stated in previous posts, Jim has not had the benefit of Kevin’s mentorship program. As viewers progress through the seasons of the Office, it becomes obvious that Jim not only does not begin with the end in mind, but actively rejects the idea of proactively moving toward an end goal at all. Acknowledging that his job at Dunder Mifflin is part of a “career” would require him to face his situation in a way he is clearly uncomfortable with.
In large part, that makes sense. The producers of The Office weren’t trying to produce a narrative conducive to mentoring. They need some element of suspense to keep the audience engaged...which would be tough to keep up if each character practiced methodical self-assessment and planning as Kevin advises.
So, I’m going to propose that we cheat, and stretch Covey’s idea a bit by using it to justify a non-chronological order for our posts. Instead of following along Jim’s career path, from beginning to end, I’m going to jump to the end. By unveiling his journey as it nears its endpoint, we’ll be better able to judge the actions he takes on his journey. We need that context: without knowing where you want to go, how can you know if you’re making the right moves or not? In the final season of The Office, we finally find out, in very clear terms, where Jim really wanted to go.
So, in our next post, we’ll jump all the way to Season 9, to see where Jim’s career ends up. And, before we do, I have to give Kudos to The Office writers for keeping Jim’s arc realistic, and thus useful for our purposes. While the antics of fellow officemates did get a little silly after almost 200 episodes (like Andy taking a multi-week trans-oceanic sailing trip on company time), Jim’s story remains strikingly grounded in reality. While he ultimately reaches his professional goals, as he defines them, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. As we alluded to in our inaugural post, life is a journey. There is no magical destination where pure bliss is attained, hard work is no longer required, and tough decisions are replaced by moralistically clear-cut paths forward.
So, with that being said, let's get started by beginning with the end in mind!
As you know, we’ve decided to try something ambitious on this blog. We’re applying our mentoring framework to the life of The Office character Jim Halpert.
In deconstructing Jim, I was tempted to start at the very beginning. After all, there’s something inherently logical about ordering things chronologically. If nothing else, it relieves me from the burden of coming up with a rational alternative!
But, as I began the research (LOL) for these posts (does this make Netflix tax-deductible?), I realized there was only one starting place that made sense to me.
In my opinion, this is the episode where we get the clearest inauguration of the beginning of Jim’s professional arc.
It starts innocently enough: the boss (Michael Scott) and his insufferable, brook-no-nonsense lackey (Dwight Schrute) are out for the day. Suddenly, the façade of business melts away. Jim, seeking to alleviate his boredom, plays some paper football with his co-workers. Pam (who would obviously be a prime candidate for Jim’s board of advisors) offers an incisive take: “Every so often, Jim dies of boredom”
But, I’d argue that Jim doesn’t die of boredom. And, it’s precisely what he does instead that makes this episode so interesting for our purposes. Having played paper football, Jim’s mind careens into a grand vision for the day: he will host an “Office Olympics.”
As always, hilarity ensues. But, against that backdrop, Jim organizes (and solicits participation for) an elaborate office-wide competition. He manages to get all of his colleagues emotionally invested in the outcome of a series of competitions based on games that, a mere 24 hours beforehand, weren’t so much as a figment of Jim’s imagination. This took creativity, leadership, interpersonal skills, organization, and more. But, most importantly, Jim did it because he wanted to do it. He was driven to do it. If he was lucky enough to have a mentoring relationship with Kevin (real life Kevin, not "The Office" Kevin), he might have realized his behavior harkened back to a topic Kevin had discussed with him at the very beginning: identifying your strengths.
“This can certainly be the most impactful assessment you can make of yourself. It should be the primary tool to set you on a smooth sailing to success. However, you must spend the proper amount of time reflecting on this. I have found that many mentees quickly rush through this essential step (where’s the thrill?) and therefore miss out on starting their journey with full knowledge of their strengths. They don’t start their journey working within their strength zone. I mean, if you were only given two zones to choose from--strength or weakness--which would you choose?”
Now, unfortunately for Jim, he’s never met Kevin. But the point remains true: intentionally or not, Jim is revealing his (very significant) strengths in this episode. And, that’s apparent to at least one other person around him.
Again, Pam delivers an incisive statement: “The thing about Jim is when he’s excited about something like the Office Olympics he gets really into it and he does a really great job, but the problem with Jim is that he works here so, that hardly ever happens”
The truth is, Jim has a large strength zone. He’s just not regularly operating within that zone at his job. One way to frame this situation is: well, at least he’s making the best of a bad situation. But another, more constructive way to frame the situation is: its incumbent upon Jim to alter his situation such that it allows him to maximally use his strengths and align his work with his goals. Indeed, that is the ultimate arc of Jim’s professional story.
But, I’m revealing too much, too early! There is plenty of ground to cover before we examine Jim reaching his full professional self-actualization.
In conclusion, I’d encourage you to do two things:
One: watch this episode of The Office. It’s still on Netflix through the end of 2020!
Two: Think about these scenarios in your own life. Maybe its not as dramatic (or funny) as Jim’s predicament, but, are you operating within your strength zone? If not, what steps are you taking to change that? Hopefully, you have not written off your destiny as subject to chance and the whims of the outside world!
Have you ever watched a tv series and wished you could “live a day in the life” of those characters? Or, somewhat similarly, have you ever seen a striking, perhaps eerie, resemblance between the situation portrayed on the screen, and situations you’ve encountered in your own life?
Well, you’re not alone.
There are many series that intentionally stretch the boundaries of our imagined existence. As I, a self-professed Star Wars fan nerd, typed that previous sentence, I was thinking about the intergalactic bounty hunters and force wielding heroes that inhabit the hit TV series The Mandalorian.
But, there are many more series that differentiate themselves, or even define themselves, by their relatability. That relatability can span all walks of life. Some focus on the dynamics of relationships between individuals of families. Some, on familiar stages in a person's life (adolescence, teenage years, college, etc.). For professional life, however, there is one TV series that stands alone, without equal, continuing its monopoly over the space long after the airing of its series finale.
If you haven’t figured it out by now, I am of course talking about The Office.
But… wait. This is a mentor blog, right? Did Kevin and Adam give up on that idea? Are they shamelessly “pivoting” to a new concept like a cash-strapped start-up grasping for a one last lease on life? Is this now…a pop-culture review blog?
Easy now. Deep breaths. We have not given up on mentoring. In fact, this post is a reflection of our doubling (tripling… quadrupling?) down.
If you're already on board with this new series: go ahead and read the first post. If you still stand ready to be convinced, read on, and I'll make my case for the value of this exercise.
While a good chunk of The Office traffics in shock humor and face-palming moments, its true genius is the relatability of most of the characters and, indeed, most of the situations they encounter. It’s not the punchlines that make the show what it is. It’s the backdrop--the incredibly relatable backdrop--that set the punchlines up for success.
Here, let me prove it to you. Which one of these videos is funnier?
This incredibly instructive and well-produced video on how to suspend things in jello.
OR
This classic scene from The Office
So what is it about that scene that makes it so funny? Is it the arbitrary and ad-hoc dispute settlement by Michael (the boss)? Is it the new guy (Ryan) trying to navigate the existing relationships in the office and “fit in?” Is it Dwight (whose stapler was jello-ed) digging himself in deeper by failing to have a sense of humor? Was it Jim knowing his colleagues so well, that he could anticipate these reactions, walking right up to the line of admonishment, but not crossing it?
It’s all of those things, and more.
But, why talk about it on the blog?
Luckily, the same manner by which The Office generates the foundation for its humor, gives us an opportunity to “mentor” Jim. By tying the show to a relatable professional background, The Office created a character with a professional arch that is interesting and instructive.
So, over a series of posts, we’ll be diving into the life, professional and personal, of Jim Halpert. You may be skeptical now, but trust me: there are many lessons to be learned in this exercise...not just how to suspend things in jello.
This series of blog posts titled “Mentoring with Glenn” is a documentation of Kevin’s mentoring sessions with a young professional named Glenn Elmore. These mentoring meetings will utilize the topics that we are discussing in our ongoing blog: “Mentoring your Mission”.
by Kevin
Mentoring tips found within this post:
Help mentee understand awareness by discuss key areas
Ask mentee to utilized a trusted third party to assist with assessment
Always challenge initial response to “dig deeper”
Ask “Why” to find deeper meaning and understanding
Thankfully, Glenn returned for our next topic--always a good sign! After ordering our usual cups of coffee, Glenn and I continued the conversation with a new goal: assessing his self awareness within eight key areas. I explained that if he rates highly in each of these areas it will undoubtedly elevate his potential and improve his relationships with others, which is critical to his success and reaching his potential.
I asked Glenn to rate himself in each of these areas based on a 1-10 scale. A perfect 10 would represent that he is constantly assessing this area, continually challenging the results, always open to feedback (without becoming defensive), and regularly making the appropriate adjustments.
Emotional awareness (How he would respond or react emotionally to situations out of his control. For example, an unforseen traffic jam). Glenn said he would assess himself fairly high, perhaps a 7. At times, he does struggle in this area, especially in stressful situations. Very recently, as he was studying for an exam, he was feeling very stressed and conceded he was reacting negatively. Glenn asked his wife: had she ever seen him stressed out like this before? She responded “yes, every couple of weeks”. This was certainly news to Glenn and made him realize that perhaps he has lacked some awareness in this area historically and it would be a good idea if he became more aware of his emotions. I think Patricia is doing her part to raise his awareness in this area!
Historical awareness. (Is he aware of how the past, such as childhood experiences, impact current decision making. A good example is how parents thought of money and how that impacts his current feelings about money.) Glenn said his self-awareness in this area has really improved as he transitioned into college and marriage, which has forced him to challenge his beliefs that were instilled in him during childhood. Therefore, he would say this is also a 7, but was lower prior to his current circumstance. Prior to college/marriage he did not have many close influencers, such as a mentor, away from his parents who could challenge his worldviews. However, the more he reads and converses with people (who are not his parents) it allows him to become more aware of his preconceived notions. Glenn admitted that challenging his beliefs can feel a little like a betrayal to his past. Yet, this does not necessarily mean he disagrees with anything his parents told him to believe, but it allows him to develop his own beliefs. This sounds like progress to me.
Relational awareness. (Ability and understanding of connection with others. Ability to make friends and deeper relationships.) Glenn feels that this is one of his core strengths, so he would give himself an 8 in this area. He has always been relational and struggles with holding other people to his same relational standard. His default position is to always take responsibility and accept blame. Glenn tends to look at situations in terms of how to fix and not blame. He is a people pleaser by nature, which has its positives and negatives. He feels strongly that he can understand when a connection is made. He is continually searching for an area/topic to connect with others. He admits that conflict is an area of struggle, which led us to the next area of awareness.
Conflict style awareness. (How does he deal with conflict: either engage or lean out). This is an area that Glenn struggles with so he would give himself a lower rating, probably a 5. He typically avoids confrontation but he is becoming more self-aware about his tendency to avoid it. He gravitates toward a passive-aggressive response to conflict. Glenn knows that he will need to become more aware of his conflict avoidance especially as he transitions into marriage. He admitted he has a fear that conflict will tear down a relationship, but understands there are times when it would actually build it up. I had to tell Glenn that this is certainly an area of needed growth for him--hopefully that wasn’t more conflict than he could handle. He seemed to take it okay.
Posture awareness. (Awareness of body language such as eye contact, slouching that reveals a lack of interest or annoyance). Glenn said he is an 8, which suggests very high awareness. Historically, this has not been an issue for Glenn. As the person sitting across from him for a meeting and a half, I could not disagree. He has been very attentive!
Tone awareness. (Are you loud, quiet, sarcastic, dismissive, uninterested without knowing it?). As a typical people pleaser he is constantly aware of his tone since he is concerned about other people’s feelings in response to his communication. Glenn rated himself as an 8 in tone awareness.
Motivation. (Do you know what drives you? Motivators can be items such as people pleasing, encouragement, pride, money, power, recognition? What reward is most attractive?) Glenn says his awareness is a 7 in this area as he knows what currently motivates him. He is also constantly assessing what should motivate him. Currently, making people happy and being likeable serve as primary motivators to Glenn. Encouragement and affirmation, feedback (both positive and negative) is also very highly motivating to him. More recently, security has been a motivator, primarily financial (which then becomes a motivator). Moving forward, he believes his motivation should transition into more spiritual security as a motivator versus financial. Glenn also wants to transition his motivation into what he can do for others, not what he can get from others.
Pride awareness. (Is he aware of his ego?) Glenn responded that pride has always been a concern to him. He constantly tries to find a balance between humility and confidence as he discussed in our prior conversation. Pride has historically concerned him as he feels it separates him from God. He rated himself as a 7.
Overall, I feel that Glenn did an excellent job of assessing his awareness. I also gave him high marks by having discussions with his spouse: Patricia.
In our continuing mentoring series titled, “High on Investment Banking”, I am documenting an ongoing mentorship with Jackson High to hopefully provide some encouragement and action steps for your mentorships.
Mentoring Tips found within this post:
Be proactive with setting up meetings within your network
If possible, participate in the meeting to provide introductions and feedback
Separately ask your contact for constructive criticism or advice.
Encourage mentee to send thank you notes
Schedule a follow up meeting with your mentee to debrief.
Jackson and I followed our action plan to meet with two investment bankers--one currently working at Goldman Sachs and the other who began his career at Goldman Sach, yet is now managing an investment fund. I reached out to both of these individuals to schedule a zoom meeting that was convenient for all involved.
Our first call was with Ricky Grant, Managing Director at Goldman Sachs, followed by a call with Blake Trippet, Chief Investment Officer at MetaFund. I participated on each of these calls, primarily to make the appropriate introductions but also to clarify any inquiries, if needed. It was also very helpful to observe the interaction between Jackson and these accomplished finance professionals. Ricky and Blake provided meaningful responses to Jackson’s questions and additional guidance and encouragement along the way. A few of my takeaways from these calls were as follows:
Find a way to connect with recruiters on a personal basis
Be persistent until you are successful
Use LinkedIn to find connections
Pursue JD or MBA if you desire to raise your profile
Internships are still primary way to land full time jobs
Find a champion or mentor for career development
Be prepared to work hard with long hours
After the meetings were over, Jackson and I agreed that it would be appropriate to send thank you cards to Ricky and Blake.
In addition, I separately asked each of these professionals to provide me with feedback on the call, such as presentation style, content of his questions, or any other thoughts that might be helpful for Jackson’s development. Based on this request, the overall feedback I received was very positive, but also constructive. I set up a meeting with Jackson to pass these thoughts along.
Stay tuned for documentation of this debrief with Jackson...
Our post this week comes from Trevor Jones. As you may recall, Trevor is participating in a blog mentorship and--even better-- he is allowing us to post the interaction! This is the second homework assignment: self awareness. After reading our post titled How Well Do You Know...You?, Trevor provided his assessment of the eight areas of self awareness. In addition (as we suggested in the post), Trevor asked a close friend to provide an assessment for him. In Trevor’s case, he asked his girlfriend, Allee Pipes, to rank his self awareness in these areas from 1 (most aware) to 8 (least aware).
If you would like to begin a blog mentorship as Trevor is demonstrating, please complete this form.
by Adam
To keep you on your toes, we've got dual ratings systems going on here.
Trevor ranked his aptitude on several dimensions of self awareness on a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 being poor, and 10 being good. For example, if Trevor were to give himself a "10" on "Relational," that would mean he perceives himself to do a great job interacting and connecting with others, among other things. So, remember, for Trevor's ranking: 10 is good, 1 is...less good!
Allee's assessment is on a different scale, and she's assessing a slightly different thing. Allee is not necessarily assessing Trevor's aptitude along these dimensions, but ranking his relative level of self-awareness along those dimensions. She's ordering the areas from 1 to 8, where 1 signifies the area with the highest level self awareness, and 8 signifies the lowest level. So, to the extent you think more self-awareness is good (and, we hope you do!), Allee's scale is running in the opposite direction of Trevor's.
So, what does that mean? Well, flipping my earlier example, say Trevor gave himself a "1" of 10 on "Relational," signifying he thinks he does relatively poorly on that that dimension. Then, Allee ranked that as "1." That might indicate Allee agrees: Trevor is accurate in his less-than-rosy self-assessment. Fortunately, and as you'll see below, that is not the case! Allee and Trevor seem to agree this is one of his strong suits.
Did you catch all that? Good! There won't be a test, so take a deep breath. Just sit back, relax, and enjoy the post!
I believe that I keep my emotions intact pretty well. It is very rare that I get upset or angry, but when I do I wear my emotions on my sleeve and it is very hard to hide. Typically there is an accumulation of many different things that make me upset, which I feel is a good thing, but when my bubble finally bursts it is immediate, not a gradual anger. I try my best to not let things get to me and if they do I usually get over them rather quick. I would rather focus on other people’s feelings and emotions in any scenario and try to keep my emotions in check so others do not feel obligated or feel the need to worry about mine. I have described myself as relaxed and think that is a good descriptor in this area. So, I will give myself a 7/10 because I go with the flow most of the time, but know I could work on my “outbursts” when they do occur.
The word adventurous is not a word that I would use to describe myself. I would describe myself as someone that makes decisions based on the facts, and would rather listen to someone first in a conversation and analyze what was being said before I make any comments. To me, that plays a big role in my historical evaluation. I don’t like to go off of the path already laid before me, but would rather try different things to see if I could make or do something better. In this day and age though, being the trendsetter or the brick layer could benefit you immensely. For this section I give myself a 4/10 because I am a rational thinker and would rather base my decisions on the past compared to paving my own way.
Hopefully I am pretty aware of myself when I write on this topic, because I believe that this area is one of my strongest, if not my strongest out of the 8 listed. I think being a good listener, and being able to rein in my emotions makes me a people person. One of my passions is to help/mentor people, so I would hope that Relational is one of my highest ranking areas. Now, I am 6’4” and rather large, so I can see how someone could think I was intimidating, but I feel that when someone gets to know me a little bit that they feel pretty comfortable around me rather quick. I deal with a lot of different kinds of people between my full time job and the head reffing job that I have, and my ability to connect with all different kinds of people really helps in those situations. For this area I will give myself an 8/10 because I believe it is one of my strongest sections, but could always be improved upon.
A lot of different factors play into this area, but I always try to listen first and then make my decisions on what to say or how to interact with someone that is not happy with me. Since I feel as if I don’t get upset too often I think listening is imperative for me. I have learned to listen to what others are feeling or their frustrations and the react to that specific concern or issue. Now I believe all of that is good, but I am going to give myself a 7/10 for this area because there have been plenty of times where I should have leaned in more compared to the other person. I think I have shied from leaning in during confrontation, because I know I am very hard headed, and don’t like to admit when I am wrong.
Posture – Trevor’s Rank: 5/10, Allee’s Rank: 4/8
This area is difficult for me to assess because I feel as if I am a very inviting person and that I can connect with people easily, but I know that I can sometimes where my emotions on my sleeve. If you know me, it can be very easy to tell when I am upset or frustrated just by my facial expressions but in general, I try and keep a smile on my face when interacting with others. Eye contact for me is big factor in posture because if someone is not looking at you while interacting I feel as if it puts off the notion that they are uninterested. I will give myself a 5/10 for this area because of the emotions I wear on my sleeves and the fact that I know my eyes can wonder frequently when interacting with somebody.
Tone – Trevor’s Rank: 3/10, Allee’s Rank: 2/8
Tone is probably the section I can improve the most. I like to listen and consume the entire situation before I make and comments or decisions, but once I make those decisions I don’t think about the delivery as much. One of my biggest flaws, in my opinion is how sarcastic I am. Whether it is to get a laugh out of someone or to prove a point, I think my sarcasm can be dangerous. Now don’t get me wrong, sarcasm can bring some light to any situation, but finding the right time and manner to use that sarcasm can be difficult to figure out. In my opinion I am very quick to speak, and should take more time to evaluate what I am going to say after I have taken time to evaluate the situation. Could that be related to my stubbornness, I would think so. I give myself a 3/10 on tone, but it is getting better as I try and work on it.
I previously mentioned that one of my passions is to mentor people, and I think you can tie in the desire to help people into that as well. I am not sure what the term for this would be but I am very motivated when it comes to assisting others. Pushing my emotions and things I have to do to the side is my forte. A good descriptor for me would be relaxed, when it comes to my own tasks and duties because I feel as if I will drop what I am doing in order to help someone else. Now, I give myself a 6/10 for this area because I will still get my work done, but sometimes it is a little delayed. I have a lot of goals and aspirations, but its always taking that first step that is the hardest for me.
I keep coming back to the fact that I have a very hard head, and tend to be stubborn in a lot of situations. For me, its not a sense of proving that I am right, but not wanting to admit that I am wrong. With that playing a big role in arrogance and pride, I think confidence plays a big role as well. Now I know this isn’t an assessment of confidence so I will keep this section short, but my confidence waivers pretty frequently, so for this section I am going to give myself a 4/10. There is a fine line between being arrogant and confident, and if I am being completely honest I toe that line too often. I frequently am not as confident as I should be, and on the other hand I am too stubborn that it can come off as arrogant. All in all I don’t look at myself and think, “Wow, I am full of pride.” So I believe I could be better and I could be worse in this area.
by Kevin
Trevor, thanks again for continuing this example of a blog mentorship! I am very impressed with your ability to assess yourself. Hopefully you found the exercise useful for your development. I would like to point out a couple of observations I had after reading your response.
Your ability to get along with others is clearly one of your greatest strengths, as evidenced by your assessment, as well as Allee’s concurrence with your assessment by ranking it as your most aware area. Your desire to serve people (through mentoring and other activities) and listen to their concerns clearly enables a quick connection. Your height (“6’4’’ and rather large” your words not mine) may put you in a position to look down on others, but your awareness allows you to build them up--creating an immediate connection. Continue to focus in this area of strength as you build your mission statement (the next homework assignment). You will find that this will allow you to make a difference as it utilizes a key strength of yours.
However, confrontation seems to be an area of improvement for you. Although you gave yourself a 7, Allee ranked it as the least aware area. I realize you focus on listening and not reacting, but perhaps there are more times that you need to speak your mind, as you indicated when you said you should lean in more. I think Allee might agree. Personally, admitting I am wrong is not easy, but in my case, it is common. When you are wrong, everyone knows it, so you might as well admit it. Confrontation can be one of the most constructive ways to reconcile a relationship, as long as it is carried out with respect and appreciation for one another.
Interestingly, the biggest disconnect you had with Allee was Tone. Allee ranked that second to the highest of the most aware area while you gave yourself a 3. I would be interested to discuss that with each of you, but perhaps you are delivering that sarcasm much better than you think?
Thanks again for submitting this homework assignment #2. I do believe you have a high degree of self awareness (i.e. relational, emotional, and motivation), but hopefully this exercise will help fine tune a few areas where you are not as aware (i.e. confrontation, historical, and pride). I am looking forward to the next assignment.
by Adam
I won’t add too much, because I think Kevin hit the nail on the head! But, I do want to commend you, Trevor. It takes a lot of humility, and an impressive level of introspection, to evaluate yourself on these dimensions and invite someone else into that evaluation. But, you’ve taken it a step further! You’ve put it all out there, allowing other prospective mentee’s and mentor’s reading this post, see behind the curtain, and understand what this exercise looks like in practice. Of course, while this self-evaluation method is an important way to solicit feedback, you’re not being graded. BUT...if you were…I think your engagement in this exercise should earn you some serious bonus points.
I am pleased to introduce Lydia’s post and her inaugural appearance on the blog. I was lucky enough to have the chance to talk through this post with her: her experience, her ideas, and the way she translated both into writing. I appreciate her contribution to the blog for two reasons in particular. One, because it portrays a highly relatable set of circumstances which many, many others have no doubt experienced (although, often not verbalized, much less written about!). Second, and perhaps not unrelated to the first point, Lydia’s writing is very authentic. I’m sure you’ll agree, and I hope you derive some value from this post!
Now, who is this “Lydia” person, anyway? Well, Lydia graduated from Oklahoma Christian University in 2018. Since then, she’s become a CPA and is working as a senior auditor for BKD in Oklahoma City.
by Lydia Harlow
Like many, I struggled with the transition that occurred after attending four years at a university and shifting into the “real world,” as people tend to say. For me, this transition came with the stereotypical responsibilities associated with becoming an adult, such as paying bills, beginning a new full-time job, and other generic characteristics and events that people generally associate with growing up. There were several characteristics of this change that were less tangible as well. I found myself struggling more than I believe the average young adult tends to struggle. It took time to gain a foothold on my new lifestyle, and I faced some unseen challenges that proved difficult to overcome. I’ll share my experience here, in hopes that someone reading this can relate to, and learn from, my story. I hope to be able to give some advice to those of you who are going through, or will soon be going through, this same transition.
I truly enjoyed my college experience. I know a lot of people tend to have a positive association with this time in their life, but I would dare to say that I appreciated those four years more than most. I was blessed enough to attend a school that I loved, a place that upheld values I hold in my personal life. College also gave me some of my closest friends that I plan to maintain a long-term relationship with. I had professors who helped me not only succeed as a student, but who truly wanted me to succeed in my personal life and spiritual relationship as well. I was able to get plugged in quickly with a college ministry that I loved, to be heavily involved with the social service club I chose to join, and participate in a multitude of other activities and leadership opportunities that made those years pivotal to my growth. Those four years were fundamental in developing me into who I am today, and it was the opportunities I was given and the people that I encountered that made it so.
Coming from the emotionally positive backdrop of my college years, my transition into the subsequent stage of my life proved challenging. I had associated so much of my personal growth with the place that I had cherished for the last several years. I had no idea what truly was to come as I opened the door (or more accurately, as I was pushed through the door), to my new beginning. Uncertainty, a full-time job, and departure from people I loved loomed in my path as I closed one door and peered through another. I was lost. I had known my place for the last four years; I knew where I fit. Suddenly, I was placed in a completely foreign situation with no identification of where my “place” was. Before this change, I knew what I needed to do to succeed. In class, I knew what was expected of me as a student and as a leader in various circumstances. Now, I was entering a situation where answers came less easily, and where my lack of experience made navigation more challenging. The future was unknown. At the beginning of this transition I struggled to gain a foothold, much less find ways to begin to thrive.
Fast forward to today. While I wish I could tell you that suddenly it clicked--that I woke up one day knowing exactly how to succeed in my new normal--that was not the case. There was a lot of trial and error, a lot of self-reflection, and a boatload of learning to admit that it was okay to not have my life completely together. However, over the last few years I have identified a few key areas that helped me gain a foothold and allowed me to begin to cultivate my growth as a professional, as well as aid in my continued evolution as an individual.
First and most foremost, I learned to reassess my situation and stop comparing myself to others. Everyone’s journey is different, and yours certainly will not look the same as your coworker or your best friend. You will face your own challenges and struggles as you navigate this transition and other pivotal changes. Instead of looking at how I stacked up to my peers, I learned to celebrate my own personal victories and learn from my failures (and trust me, I’ve had plenty).
Second, and equally as important, I began to understand that I had power over my mindset. I could choose to have a positive attitude, I could choose to do my best today. Realizing that I had power over not only my future, but also current situations, was a game-changer. While planning for the future is a good thing, and something that you should certainly do to an extent, the steps that you take each day and the attitude you choose are a factor in what will transpire. You may not view each individual day as a success, but realizing that you truly do have power over aspects in your day-to-day life is a key factor in navigating the unknown.
The third aspect that assisted me in my transition was to surround myself with a supportive network of trusted mentors and peers that helped me navigate uncertain times. I’ve learned that it’s important to have a variety of individuals that I trust that balance both advice and guidance as well as allowing me to tread my own path. Realizing that I did not have to navigate the transition alone was pivotal in my growth and continues to be an important factor in my personal and professional life today.
I’ll be the first to admit that certain days are still difficult – sometimes I don’t make a conscious effort in establishing a constructive mindset, and some days it’s hard to see how a trying day can turn into a stepping stone in my long-term goals. However, through giving myself grace and doing my best to apply the factors described above, I’ve learned to fall into a rhythm and embrace the lifestyle that I now call normal. I hope that as you’re entering a similar transitional phase you can take something away from my experience, and see that there is beauty in the unknown and unlimited potential to develop yourself through a multitude of avenues and opportunities.
As you might read in my recap of meeting #1, Jackson High has an ambitious plan to begin a career in investment banking. Or, as I like to articulate it, Jackson is High on Investment banking (hopefully he is successful as I am hokey)!
In addition to the full post, I thought it might be useful to summarize mentoring tips that can be found within each post to provide ideas for mentors to consider for their mentees.
Mentoring Tips found within this post:
Help your mentee clearly articulate his/her purpose—or goal—with a mission statement;
Identify mentee’s strengths and weaknesses, preferably with the use of a third party;
Allow your mentee to access your personal network and help him/her develop appropriate questions;
Gather feedback from your mentee to ensure expectations continue to be properly aligned.
My next mentoring meeting with Jackson focused on an action plan—or strategy—to delve into the world of investment banking. First, we felt that we should understand and define Jackson’s ultimate mission statement for these next few years to add clarity and purpose to this process. In addition, I wanted to identify Jackson’s strengths and weaknesses, so we could develop his weaknesses—if necessary—and promote his strengths.
In order to articulate a clear mission statement, we focused on Jackson’s roles and goals. After a series of back and forth questions about Jackson’s desires, we came up with the following mission statement to serve as our guide:
“I am a Finance student whose discipline, motivation, and collaborative mindset allows me to leverage the collective contributions of those around me into value for the organization as a whole. I aim to accomplish this by fully applying myself, by learning from those who have gone before me, and by emulating the virtues of the highest caliber of companies”.
I know I am inspired, as is Jackson!
Next we discussed his strengths and weaknesses in more detail. Jackson utilized a current trusted relationship to get feedback on his abilities, which I recommend for all mentees. Based on this feedback, as well as introspection on his accomplishments, we concluded that Jackson’s primary strengths are analytical/Insightful, work ethic, consistency and his weaknesses are work/life balance, lack of sensitivity, and overconfidence (at times). After discussing these in more detail, we felt like his strengths would fit nicely with our perception and observation of investment bankers. We also discussed some tools for overcoming his weaknesses, which were inserted into his mission statement as a mechanism for improvement, clarity and focus.
The obvious next step to learning more about investment banking—we believed—was to meet with “real” investment bankers. Thankfully, due to my current role at a commercial bank, I interact with many investment bankers on a regular basis. I have discovered that investment bankers, by their very nature, are gifted at building relationships...so leveraging these current relationships made sense, I surmised. Jackson and I discussed these relationships and determined that we would begin our meetings with two professionals: the first currently works at Goldman Sachs and the other began his career with Goldman Sachs but is now managing an investment fund. However, we discussed several more investment bankers we would meet with subsequent to our initial meetings, such as KBW, Piper Sandler, Infinity Capital Partners, Commerce Street, DA Davidson, JP Morgan, and others.
We then discussed questions we would ask each of these professionals, such as: how to obtain an internship, is it worthwhile to attend grad school or law school, advice on the recruiting process, how to make an introduction from a non-target school, what it takes to succeed as an investment banker, what is a desired GPA, advice for interviewing, and more. Ideally, we would have more questions than time allowed with each person.
I concluded the meeting by committing to set up the meetings with each of the professionals previously mentioned. I want to finish this post by sharing a comment that Jackson passed along to me—as the mentor—that I believe will be motivating to any mentors reading this blog. Jackson stated that, “this process has been a huge help so far. It’s so refreshing to get advice from someone with experience rather than someone who read an article online about resume creation.” I share that to encourage our mentors to continue meeting with young professionals. Your live interaction is valuable, and your experiences are worth sharing with the next generation.
Stay tuned to hear about our first meetings with investment bankers....
This post is the second in a two part series: read last week's post here.
by Kevin
Our second tale comes from Ian Morris. I met Ian several years ago while he was still a college student at Oklahoma Christian University. Consequently, it has been particularly satisfying to see his career develop to where it is now. However, it wasn’t always smooth sailing for Ian. As careers often do, his journey demanded difficult decisions, as you can read below...
by Ian Morris
I had been working in Public Accounting for just over five years and was starting to get restless in my job and was reimagining where I wanted my career to head. This was the first time I truly felt like I did not know what the next step in my career would be. There was one feeling I felt every time that I thought of making a real change: FEAR. Fear, as I would come to learn a little later, was the one major hurdle to me taking action to seek and ultimately find an incredible opportunity.
After five years, I left one month prior to being promoted to manager. It all began to unravel in the summer of 2018. At that time I was working as a Tax Senior at Ernst &Young in Dallas, TX and was enjoying almost every aspect of it. I was performing my job at a high level, got to work with incredible colleagues and clients each day, and was just notified of a promotion to Manager later that fall. Sounds like a dream, right? Ever since I graduated college and got my CPA license five years prior this had been my goal and I truly loved it, most of the time. I began to reconsider after a conversation I had with a guy at church that was several years older than I, and had a very similar career as mine up to this point. The difference between him and I was that he decided to leave BEFORE making manager for, what I considered was, the dream exit opportunity.
This began me on the path of wondering if I, too, could find this elusive opportunity early on. What made the choice difficult was that again, I was overall very happy where I was at and had a stable and well defined career path for at least the next 7-10 years. My only hesitation with continuing in Public Accounting long term was the constant late hours and ever increasing administrative responsibilities as you progress. At the time my wife and I were expecting our first child, so those long hours at the office weighed especially heavy on my mind. After much thought and time, I made the decision to seek out a recruiter. I ended up working with three separate recruiters and moving on from the first two before gaining some traction with the third one. Through that process I learned that my biggest obstacle to finding my dream opportunity was my fear of the unknown and endless what ifs.
Once I learned what was holding me back I began to search for how to overcome this fear. At the time I had just purchased a book by Tim Ferris called Tools of Titans. In searching through this book for some inspiration I came across a section called Fear Setting, and it turned out to be just what I needed. It is a simple exercise of defining your fears pertaining to a specific decision you are struggling with and weighting the probability of that fear actually happening, then coming up with a solution to mitigate it. Through that exercise it became clear that I was stuck on what if I change jobs and end up unhappy, thus wasting time when I could have been progressing in Public Accounting. This fear was holding me back from exploring what possible opportunities were out there.
After doing this exercise a couple more times, meeting with my mentors (including Kevin), and talking it over with my wife, I decided to move forward with the job hunt and find that opportunity. At EY I was working primarily with real estate and private equity clients. I found the mix of real estate and private equity very interesting and knew this mix could be were very profitable depending on the company. Thankfully in Dallas, TX there are a number of these types of firms that my recruiter began seeking out for me.
I also wanted make a trajectory change in my career and get away from just focusing on taxes as that was not what I desired to do indefinitely. This proved to be difficult because not many companies wanted to take on, and pay, someone with five years’ experience in tax just to give them a fresh start. At this point I started to see the writing on the wall and had three viable options. I either make a change, stay in Public Accounting, or switch over to industry at some point as a tax manager or director. The latter two of these are great careers and pay well, but ultimately were not what I truly desired for myself long term. I hoped to one day be the CFO at a private equity fund, and making this trajectory change early on seemed like a good next step in that direction.
With a narrower list of companies I was willing to look at and also wanting to shift away from tax we began the search. At the time I was just starting with my third and final recruiter and was fortunate in that they had a couple companies in mind, one large investment company with public funds and one smaller private company that focused solely on real estate. I ended up interviewing at each of these companies plus one more and got an offer with the third one I interviewed at. Fortunately that ended up being my favorite of the three and I was ecstatic to have gotten an offer there. In the end after a little bit of negotiation we were able to come to an agreement and I happily made the move.
After almost two years at the new company I can say that this has been a great move and I have been truly fortunate in that I get to do what I enjoy each day. We are presented with new and exciting challenges daily and I feel I am continually learning new things. To wrap it all up, I would strongly encourage anyone who reads the blog to let the things you will learn through Kevin and Adam’s mentorship guide you. I would also encourage anyone who is struggling to make a difficult choice or determine which path to take, to do the Fear Setting exercise I mentioned. Both will change the way you confront your fears and lay out the path to making more sound decisions.
Landing that first job out of school can be very exciting. It can also be challenging. Yet, what may be even more challenging is the decision that comes next: how long do you continue at your initial place of employment, and when do you move to the next opportunity? If you’ve been performing at a high level while feeling (generally) satisfied and content, that decision can become even more fraught.
In the world of public accounting, the promotion to “manager” is traditionally viewed as a significant and desirable milestone, something that signifies your career is on the right track. Although timelines can vary, it typically takes approximately 5 years to accomplish this feat. Although beneficial, is it essential to hang on until the five year manager promotion timeline to jumpstart a successful career?
Over the next two weeks you can read from two guest bloggers who have faced this difficult decision to remain until manager, yet arrived at two different—yet equally valid—conclusions.
Our first “tale” comes from Shelby Stone. Shelby graduated from the University of Oklahoma in 2014. I met Shelby a few years ago as she was grappling with this decision to continue her public accounting career with KPMG and, accordingly, set an aspiring goal to become a manager. I believe you will find her decision making process interesting and useful, particularly if you or someone you are mentoring is dealing with a similar dilemma to stay or go…
by Shelby Stone
When asked why I set out to be an audit manager, my knee jerk response is, “isn’t that what I was supposed to do?” As I reflect back, all the cliché reasons on why “staying until Manager” is a great career move come flooding back. “You will accelerate your career.” “You will be exposed to so many different processes and clients resulting in a well-rounded set of skills.” “You will manage faster.” “The learning curve is steep with the knowledge gained being invaluable.” The irony is all those reasons, cliché or not, contribute to why I am so glad I stayed until Manager. I firmly believe that everyone’s career path is unique to them. For example, going into industry immediately out of college or leaving public outside year 3 (1 year of senior associate) or year 6 (one year of manager) can still result in just as fulfilling of a career. However, I can acknowledge now that the cliché reasons to stay in public ring true.
For me, I didn’t exactly set out to be a Manager. I took the classic road of majoring in accounting, interning with Public during college, and accepting a full-time position before even graduating. I passed the CPA exam and earned my license after my first year as an associate. It was what all my friends were doing, and it is what my college promoted. I was enjoying the “work hard, play hard” mentality of Public Accounting and being surrounded by young professionals of similar backgrounds. I had many family friends associated with public accounting and I just thought this was what I was supposed to be doing. Typical of most public accountants, as I was wrapping up year three and completing my first year as a senior associate, I started contemplating the ever-present question of, “should I stay or should I go?” Like most, my first couple of years had been rough between the hours and challenging work. I also had lots of self-doubt that left me wondering if I was even capable of being a Manager.
So, I decided to look around and see what other opportunities were out there. I highly recommend this if you are ever feeling unhappy in your position because oftentimes you will find the grass is not always greener. Nevertheless, everything I considered just never really felt like the right fit. It was then when I decided I was going to give being a Manager a shot, and see if I could survive the next two years and learn as much as I had been promised. [Spoiler alert: I did.] Now don’t get me wrong, the next two years were not a walk in the park. I questioned my choice several times along the way, but each year, I kept finding myself surprised at the knowledge and skills I developed.
Honestly, while my accounting technical knowledge was expanding, I was most surprised at the skills I was sharpening related to management and communication. Now I can look back and say, the development of soft skills is really what has set my public experience apart. To some degree, you are responsible for managing your time with tight deadlines under stressful conditions, even as a first-year associate. You learn to communicate effectively and efficiently with your seniors and managers, have discussions with client contacts, and document that information within the workpapers. These skills are then continually developed as you progress through the firm and gain more responsibility with most in-charging engagements after only being removed from college for two years. All of these skills developed over this short time create strong performing individuals who have a great opportunity to continue at their firm, and quite a few opportunities to take those skills and apply them to new adventures.
After completing my first year as a Manager, I can look back and say that all the reasons to stay are valid. I even discovered reasons I didn’t consider before such as flexibility, plenty of PTO, extensive training resources, travel, high-quality culture, and unique opportunities, to name a few. Truthfully, I have no new profound ideas of why staying until Manager in public accounting is beneficial. I can acknowledge that the Manager path is not always the best path for every individual, and I am certainly not here to argue that it is. My statement and sentiments are only that if you choose it is the right path for you, then it is most definitely worth it.
