by Adam
In our last post in this series, we explored Jim’s deficiencies in the Character department as he embarked on a new journey in his career, with his wife belatedly and reluctantly in tow.
While that lapse in judgement is not the focus of this post, it laid the groundwork for Jim's difficulties in the topic we’re exploring today: communication.
Now, communication is not and explicit element of our Mentoring Program. That’s not because it isn’t important. It is!
Take a look at this 2016 survey on key elements to living a full life. Notable among them are:
- Family - 32%
- Success - 12%
- Giving - 8%
- Health - 7%
Notably absent are things like:
- Breathing
- Not starving to death
- Literacy
- Modern Plumbing
Now, you could definitely take issue with the last point. While I certainly am appreciative for modern plumbing’s presence in my life, many a human being in antiquity (and even current day) find meaning and purpose in their lives without a sink that runs or a toilet that flushes. But, as you work your way up that second list, you’ll find elements that become more and more basic, more and more a part of the assumed foundation for a normal life in modern times. Breathing, of course, is the prerequisite for, well, anything.
So, why did respondents leave these off the list? For the same reason Communication isn’t a headline section of the Mentoring Program.
I won’t claim it “goes without saying” that communication is important, not least because I would contradict that notion by continuing to write this post about it. But, I think it’s accurate to say that communication can be assumed to be the bedrock of just about any human endeavor that requires interaction with other people (which is most human endeavors), and even some that don’t!
Indeed, Kevin urges mentees to write down their Mission Statement and Goals. This serves a useful function in helping distill vague ideas and feelings into more precise and actionable dicta. Importantly, it also allows you to communicate through space and time (WHOA!) to future-you, who can look back on the priorities formed by prior-you, and use that to evaluate your progress.
But, I digress. After all, the title of this post is “Money Talks in the Office.” I’ll admit, it’s a bit of a bait and switch for me to have titled this post as such. To go full grammar school, I’m not using “talks” as a verb. So, if you’re hoping to read a post about how Jim walks into the Office with a stack of Benjamins, makes it rain, gets everything he wants, and then gives a short speech to the documentary crew about how “money talks”...well...this post is not for you.
No, I’m referring to “talks” as a noun. You know, that slow, deliberative process of communicating with another person to reach consensus, or at least a shared understanding of each other’s perspective. And, as you may have guessed, the talks I’m referring to are about money.
But, to confuse the matter even further, the subject of this post is not a certain set of money talks between Jim and Pam. In fact, its about the absence or insufficiency of money talks between the pair.
Que the dialogue from Episode 5, Season 9 ("Here Comes Treble"):
Jim: “Listen, are you sure you’re ok with me putting in this much money”
Pam: “Yeah, I mean listen, if we’re gonna do this thing than we should do it right”
Jim: “You’re the best”
Pam: “I kind of am, it’s crazy”
Off to a good start, right? Looks like Jim and Pam are finally working from the same playbook.
Business Partner: “I also have been running the numbers and between our backers, and our investment, we’re looking great for a full year on this”
Jim: “Is it too late to get in?”
Business Partner: “Jim, I explained everything, and you’re all set”
Jim: “Oh no, I actually talked to my wife, and we’d really like to invest, you know, get in on the ground floor”
Business Partner: “Wow, well, what level of investment are you thinking about?”
Jim: “We were thinking somewhere between $5, $10 thousand. [uncomfortable pause] I can do the full $10 thousand, we should just [motions with hands]...all-in”
Business Partner: “All right, welcome aboard”
Jim: “Cool”
A little bit awkward...Jim looked uncomfortable, and obviously ended up at the high end of what he was comfortable with. But, all is good, right? Surely he and Pam were explicit enough in their talks that Jim’s high end was also Pam’s. Right…?
Pam: “Oh hey how’d it go?”
Jim: “Oh it was great, they were great”
Pam: “Did you end up investing?”
Jim: “I did, yeah”
Pam: “How much?”
Jim: “Uh, I guess by the end it was… about… 10”
Pam: “About ten?”
Jim: “Ten, it was the full ten”
Pam: “Wow”
Jim: “Yeah”
Pam: “Wow”
Jim: “Yeah, it’s a good thing we talked about it though because, we had to”
Pam: “So did everybody end up investing ten thousand?”
Jim: “Um, oh man, I don’t actually know”
Pam: “What?”
Jim: “They weren’t actually talking all that much about money, they just said we’re good with investing, and then…”
Pam: “They said they were done with investing and then you volunteered ten thousand dollars”
Jim: “Well I had to, I needed to look like a team player”
Pam: “So you invested ten thousand dollars to look like a team player?”
Jim: [as office meeting is beginning in the background] “We’ll talk about it later”
Pam: “No, I want to talk about it now. Jim, that was most of our savings”
Jim: “Some, we said some”
Pam: “We’ll talk about it later”
Oof. There’s a lot of subtext in this interaction, but I’m going to focus on two things.
First: it’s impossible to fully understand this interaction without understanding Jim’s prior breach of character, and breach of trust. With everything you do, you’re either adding to, of subtracting from, your reputation. Understandably, Pam did not default to the most generous interpretation of Jim’s conduct and motives.
Second: communication is really, really important. We like to think that we’ve put together a fantastic mentoring program to provide a foundation for you professional and personal development. But it isn’t everything you’re going to need! Execution requires a variety of skills, and even the best laid plans go awry.
There’s a famous Mike Tyson quote:
“I ain’t the same person I was when I bit that guy’s ear off”
...wait...sorry...not that one!
“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth”
Now, while I hope your career and personal life doesn’t involve the realistic prospect of being literally punched in the mouth, I do think there is some wisdom there about plans. They’re great! They’re necessary. But, alone, they are not sufficient.
That will continue to be a theme throughout this series. Embarking on the mentoring program is an important step. But, it doesn’t contain the answer to all of your life's problems. It’s just a map. You’re the one that has to walk the road, putting one foot in front of the other, encountering and dealing with obstacles along the way.